禁止对爱人说的话(2)

　　3.在公共场合就说：“我真受不你这样或那样”。在别人面前揭你爱人的短或批评，将会对你们感情中的信任造成永久性的伤害。对错并不重要。家里的事家里解决。

　　4. Why do you always . . . Focusing on your spouse's weaknerather than building on their strengths will only increase their weakneand diminish their strength. This habit can send a relationship into a downward spiral if weaknesses are pointed out and commented upon. Succedoes breed success. Stick with the strengths and don't focus on weakness.

　　4.你怎么老是。。。?总盯着你爱人的缺点，而不是放大TA的优点，只会让TA的优点更少缺点更多。指出并批评爱人的缺点，这一毛病会让你们的感情每况愈下。成功孕育成功。多注意对方的优点，不要总盯着缺点。

　　5. Ask for your spouse's opinion and then do the opposite. We have heard from many angry divorced or almost divorced couples that this is the greatest indicator of "disrespect." If you ask where your spouse wants to go to dinner and he/she suggests a couple of places, then you select a different one, by your actions you said, "I do not respect your opinion and don't care what you think!"

　　5.问过你爱人的意见却反其道而行。从很多愤怒的离婚的或即要离婚的人们口中，我们都有所耳闻，这是最大的“不尊重”。如果你问你的爱人想去哪儿吃晚饭，她说了几个地方，而你却挑了一个别的。你是在用行动告诉好：“我不尊重你的意见，也不在乎你怎么想。”

　　Since saying negative or hurtful things can be damaging to a loving relationship, it is wise to take extra caution before engaging your mouth when these negative thoughts come into your mind。

　　既然这些消极而伤人的事情会伤害到你们的感情，所以，在那些消极的想法涌入脑海时，下意识地慎从口从不失为一个明智之举。